Jesus the Vampire's Landing Spot

BIDEN'S INCOHERENT RAMBLINGS AND IDIOTIC GAFFES - IS HE DEMENTED, OR JUST PLAIN STUPID? -- by Wolf Jackal, AP News 7 April 2020 (AP) The rapidly deteriorating mental condition of presidential candidate Joseph Biden became even more apparent today when he was heard blurting out obscenities and afterward adding an incoherent string of words that defy anyone's comprehension.  Having left a restroom at a DNC office, a piece of toilet paper stuck to the heel of his shoe, Biden, apparently unaware that he was on camera, said, "God damn - I had to piss like a racehorse and the fucking sink in the toilet isn't working, so I had to wash my hands in the commode!" Frowning, he looked to the assemblage of reporters and added, "Oh shit, strike that!" Then, noticing his fly was open, he shrugged and zipped it up. Most complied with his request, excepting for this reporter, who had a digital recording device hidden in my sport jacket. "You are an uncou...

NEWSFLASH! UGLY KATHY GRIFFIN ALLEGEDLY CONTRACTS WUHAN VIRUS - WILL HER HIDEOUS LOOKING FACE BE ENOUGH TO BATTLE THE AFFLICTION? - By Wolf Jackal, Associated Press 26 March 2020 (AP) Ridiculously unfunny, disgustingly obnoxious and thoroughly unattractive "comedian", 59 year old bag Kathy Griffin, has apparently diagnosed HERSELF with the Chinese Wuhan coronavirus, and is said to have been admitted to a "major hospital" sometime within the past few days. It is also said that she blames Donald Trump for her alleged affliction, and is vowing revenge against the President.  This information comes courtesy of her latest publicist, a male prostitute Griffin has hired from Skid Row, Alex "Buff" Hedstrom. Her last publicist, Nancy Rosen, quit, having endured years of abuse from the "comedian", and called Griffin "a complete and utter asshole that is obsessed with Donald Trump the way that nut John Hinckley was obsessed with goddamn Jodie F...

February 27, 2020   by  Boyce Day

In the year 2016, Star Trek celebrated its 50th anniversary. I was, and still am, a fan of the original series, having grown up with while among hippies, stoners, and other counter-cultural types watching it during its reruns in the 70's. However, I still think it's amazing how a show that lasted barely three seasons and suffered from low ratings throughout its run would eventually spawn multiple knock-offs in the form of numerous TV shows and movies, a language (Klingonese), and what in many ways could be interpreted as a religion and a way of life. Oh yeah, and let's not forget BILLIONS of dollars in revenue. One cannot deny the cultural impact of Star Trek . In addition to providing social commentary in numerous episodes, countless engineers and technicians were inspired to become engineers and technicians by watching the show. Unlike most science fiction, it is a model of an ideal, non-dystopian future, where humanity evidently solved all of its chronic and...

Once upon a time, there was a bisexual albino black man named Charleton Bglippe who set off across the Golden Gate Bridge for the purpose of jumping from it. Originally from Nigeria, he was kidnapped by a Saudi prince, initially for amusement purposes, and then for sexual ones. Bglippe was repeatedly raped by Saudi Princes and Princesses before he was tossed into the Royal Stable, where the horses had their way with him. After escaping by hiding in a bag of cash bound for ISIL and stowing away on a container full of khat bound for Somalis in Canada, he made his way to San Francisco. Although very popular at first, they grew tired of his constant whining and utter lack of money and table manners. He was tired of it all; he was too black to be white, too white to be black, too gay to be straight, and too straight to be gay. His white female lover dumped him for someone blacker and less gay, and his black male lover dumped him for someone whiter and more gay. Bglippe had had enough, a...

A couple of years ago some fellow bloggers and I were on the topic of the Russian so-called musical group “Pussy Riot”. Although their so-called “music” is about as pleasant as getting teeth pulled through your ass while being waterboarded with liquid nitrogen and getting bitch-slapped by a Grizzly bear, we had to give them credit for their name. There’s so much in a name, so here’s some of the more stupid-yet-probably-appropriate names we came up with:

U.S.—A tough, high-priced, and brutally competitive housing market is forcing more and more millennials to live in a van down by the river. Many 20-30 somethings are also having to live on a steady diet of government cheese, sources confirmed. They also do a lot of doobie-rolling. "I went out and thought I could be a writer or something," said Aiden Farley, 28. "But it was pretty clear to me that when homes are going for $750,000 or more in my area, I'll be living in a van down by the river for the foreseeable future." "There's pretty much no hope," said one expert, Christopher Spade. "You can go out and try to get the world by the tail and put it in your pocket." "But yeah, you're probably gonna end up living in a van down by the river." Boomers say the housing market is not a problem, pointing out that if they could buy a new home for a nickel in the 1960s, their grandchildren should have no problem scraping u...