John Lennon: Hippiecrite

Lennon doing his Manson impersonation. If only Charlie had a better agent!


When a religious nut named Mark D. Chapman pumped four bullets into John Lennon's musical British guts on December 8, 1980, sending him to the big “love-in” down below, almost the entire world recoiled in shock and horror. How could someone gun down this wonderful, peace-loving, generous, and marvelous person? Who in their right mind would subtract such an addition as John Lennon? As Lennon himself said back in the 60's, the Beatles were bigger than Jesus, which provoked a huge backlash against the Beatles in general and Lennon in particular, so it shouldn't have been very surprising that one of Jesus's loyal homies showed Lennon's lime-sucking ass who was really the capo tutti capo of the masses that make up approximately 99% of the human population that both claimed to represent, and, most important, TO LEAD AND TO RULE. Much like the Kennedys, Lennon apparently fucked with the wrong bunch, as if the U.S. Government wasn’t bad enough.

But, why did Chapman REALLY smoke Lennon’s Limey tax-evading ass? Because, in Chapman's view, Lennon was a hypocrite and a traitor in addition to being a sinner and a blasphemer. Chapman used the novel The Catcher in the Rye as his “Bible”. Like everyone I ever met or knew of that read and/or possessed and/or identified with that book, both Chapman and Lennon were not wonderful, peace-loving, generous, nor marvelous. For the most part, he was a master manipulator and the polar opposite of all of those normally admirable qualities. If he were alive today, he'd probably be drowned and shattered on the rocks of PC-ness due to the tsunami also known as "the Weinstein effect", with militant lawyers like Gloria Allred surfing and “hanging ten” all over his bespectacled fuckin’ head, so it's safe to say that Chapman possibly did Lennon a huge favor by sparing him the disgrace and humiliation that would have undoubtedly came his way.

John Lennon, like most social activists and just about every musician I've ever known, led a life that makes human organ traffickers seem moral by comparison. Far from being the pacifist he claimed to be, Lennon was well-known for his violent verbal outbursts and physical assaults. I wonder if they ever asked him to "give peace a chance"? A friend of the working man? My ass! Lennon wasn’t known for philanthropy, and rarely left the luxury and rarified atmosphere that his fame and fortune brought him until the day that four .38 caliber slugs relieved him of the horrific burden of pondering his next gourmet meal, his next bank transfer, his next mansion, and his next piece of ass. At least he didn't have to wake up to Yoko Ono the next morning; she was as visually appealing as a piece of rotten sushi with a STENCH to match, and her vocals and music were less appealing than hearing a dog shitting razor blades.

Being a lifelong Rolling Stones fan, I never cared much for the Beatles, and I totally disagree that they were "the greatest band ever." BULLSHIT!!! To be fair, every generation has their own versions of who are "great" and who are not, but to say they were "the greatest" indicates both shallow horizons and a narrow mind, or vice-versa. Every day of every year, talented and non-talented people express themselves, and, until that asteroid, meteor, or comet strikes the Earth and puts it out of its misery, I hope that goes on as unabated as possible. I love music in many forms, but the last thing I’ll do is to defer to some doofus musician as a substitute for some godlike being. They’re entertainers; nothing more and nothing less.

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